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Newsletters 2021

January 2021 

Deep the Habit - 2021 


 

Delicate

 

out on the streets of what you told me

there are buildings falling down on both sides 

i’m holding steady on my feet

telling you, telling me it’s alright 

 

sometimes i think that we just say it

we wanna hear what it sounds like out loud

but be careful this is delicate

what we say is gonna follow us around 

 

the word can have so many layers

one for you, one for me, one for us

i pay attention to the teller

how it moves is the truth

physical 

 

sometimes i think that we just say it

we wanna hear what it sounds like out loud

but be careful this is delicate 

what we say is gonna follow us around 

i can’t walk away from this

i mean what I say with this

and i know that it's delicate 

 

you keep saying never always

everytime ever since absolute

but i was there for the grey space

i was living in the bright lights of you

 

sometimes i think that you just say it

you wanna hear what it sounds like out loud

but be careful this is delicate 

what you say is gonna follow you around 

i can’t walk away from this 

i mean what I say with this 

i know that its delicate 

 

the world is made of words

the families and the herds 

to be known is to be heard 

 

Follow me down 

 

follow me down

follow me down i can’t go up

 

i wish i could 

i wish i could not see

i wish i could not see the cracks 

 

but i’ve been looking 

i’ve been looking

 

and then i find

find myself paralyzed 

find myself paralyzed by other lives 

 

but i’ve been moving 

i’ve been moving 



 

Birds 

 

i am a late morning sleeper 

when i leave my mind alone 

a dream you haven’t finished 

can become a longer one 

 

birds out on a wire like a bracelet on the blue 

how long can you decorate deciding what to do 

you’re never gonna choose

 

when you stacked your patterns 

i became an open line 

of what do we inherit 

of what do we leave behind 

 

birds out on a wire like a bracelet on the blue 

how long can you decorate deciding what to do

you’re never gonna choose 

 

but you’ve got those eyes 

and they look good to me 

even when they are closed 

even when they’re wandering 


 

North Decatur 

 

got to knowing 

every word in its passing 

all that i have 

in the kitchen

tap it out on the table 

all that i have 

 

North Decatur 

and a forest behind it

all that i have 

oh magnolia 

painting light on the window 

all that I have 

 

my collection 

deep the habit my memory 

all that I have 


 

Last of my Kind

 

am i

the last 

the last of my kind 

 

i know how this instrument is designed 

and I’m standing on the edge of past my prime 

and everyone can ask me, yeah that’s fine 

but I don’t really know 

 

am i 

the last 

the last of my kind 

 

i can say i do not want it all 

i prefer the mystery unfold 

but if I let it go well, its gonna go 

and i can’t get it back 

 

will it be lonely? in a way that i cannot see?

 

am i

the last 

the last of my kind 


Century 

 

out in the garden where we started 

we are two strangers trying to understand 

we just want to know how the locals grow

 

before the sun comes up we go out 

before the sun goes down we come out 

when the light is changing that’s when we go outside to find our way

 

i am exposed

wearing nothing but my clothes 

and my companion she is blooming 

i can see it on her skin 

 

before the sun comes up we go out 

before the sun goes down we come out 

when the light is changing that’s when we go outside to find our way 

 

and the ghosts out here don’t mind 

they see it all the time 

on the edge you cannot hide 

on a sea bed out in the moonlight 

 

Now we know

 

i can’t shake the feeling 

that this ship is sinking 

casual as a curve 

lower and lower 

 

it’s a shame we cannot use 

all the little maps we drew 

back when the world was new 

 

now we know about the details 

now we know about the dark 

now we know about the details 

now we know about the cost 

 

Just how small 

 

some fill it up with aliens 

some fill it with mermaids 

i fill mine with vanity 

and mistakes that i have made 

while i ache for what is coming 

and i ache for what is gone

 

out on the open sea 

with your batteries and the stars 

can you see 

just how small you really are 

while we ache for what is coming 

and we ache for what is gone

while the mountains keep on spilling 

into rivers we keep drinking from 

how do you populate the void?

 

Relevant

 

the vision of what’s relevant is getting crowded, getting strange

all i see could scatter me 

it doesn’t stop it doesn’t wait 

but the longer I look at you

the longer I want to 

 

i look both ways

crooked straight

back and forth across your face

i’ve seen the range

watched it change 

i’m leaning in i’m leaning in 

cause the longer i look at you the longer i want to 

 

Easy As I

 

i am moving through the rooms

touching everything i knew 

pick it up and put it down let it pass through 

 

light comes crimson in the fall 

i put stars up on the wall

i was given my own vision i recall 

 

i want to let things go as easy as i pick them up 

 

oh release the physical 

carpet woven on the floor 

we wore dresses fell asleep on furniture

 

i wanna let things go as easy as i pick them up

WATER DOG - 2017

BOTH 

 

smaller than a drop of rain / smaller than a seed / smaller than a word without a sound / bigger than an open sky breathing on the sea / big as my heart beating out loud / both / I am just an animal, an impulsive thing / burning up my turn upon the earth / navigate the size of my meandering / here upon the ground in the dirt / where I can only see the forest from the trees / I can only stand beneath their branches / and listen to the leaves whispering to me / don’t you know that all the ends are loose ones / both / there is not a loophole baby there is not a string / this is not a practice run / I was just a fool to think that I could come clean / everybody comes with what they’ve done / And I can only see the forest from the trees / I can only stand beneath their branches / and listen to the leaves whispering to me / don’t you know that all the ends are loose ones / both are happening 

 

 

 

RECORDS 

 

waking with the rhythm and the chemicals in bloom / the bodies of the water and the phases of the moon / there are so many ways for the day to arrange when it breaks on you and me / so open up the windows you can put a record on / wrap your arms around me / wrap your mouth around a song / there are so many ways for the sounds that we make / and I take the sound with me / everyone around this table occupying / I know that we’re living / I know that we’re dying / every moment a new one is arriving / it’s rolling over me just like a pen upon a page / a dog out in the grass it’s like a light upon the stage / there are so many ways for your love to behave / for your hands to be laid / for the bed that we make / for the chances we take / for the light to arrange, for a light that we make / it’s a life that we make you and me / everyone around this table occupying / I know that we’re living / I know that we’re dying / I know that we’re living

 

 

 

SPRING CLEAN

 

oh the fog is rolling in / not to cool or to darken / not for any old thing it’s just breathing / oh the fog is rolling in / I spent the afternoon / moving half empty jars round the room / all this water to drink / all this friction in the spring / I spent the afternoon / but life is long / life is long / but it’s going by just like a song / this path is an open field / with an echo behind the wheel / bouncing off of the sides / ricochet in my mind / this path is an open field / life is long / life is long / but it’s going by just like song

 

 

 

TANTRUM

 

oh my darlin’ / let’s go walking in the trees / you and me / give me your tantrums / put them in my hands I still believe / I believe / oh I still see you I still see / oh I still see you I still see / oh my darlin’ / sun will come and set the water free / you will see / holes for swimming / not for filling / you are complete / oh I still see you I still see / oh I still see you I still see / and I know you want roots / and I know you want wings / but you sank like a stone and you fell like a tree / and the bridge that you came in on / always breaks at its weakest rung / but you’re right back where you belong / here next to me / oh my darlin’

 

 

 

COUNTRY

 

maybe when it’s all said and done / I find the only thing I want / is a place in the country / maybe when it’s all done and said / belly stove and a feather bed / in my place in the country / don’t you want to find a place to stay with me / don’t you want to find a way to stay / we’ll have a porch for sleeping on / when all the cooler nights are gone / and the dogs come out to greet me / and in the kitchen light comes through / for all the growing up we’ll do / if you come here to meet me / don’t you want to find a place for sinking in / don’t you want to sit and watch the rain begin / cause I’m getting tired of the speed of things these days / and I want to take my time and not give it all away / my distance from the fire’s what I’ve earned / and I think that a slow burn is what will be keep me warm / we can fill it with instruments / the legacy of time we spent / all the places in this country / desert varnish on the stars / love songs and passing cars / all the places in this country / don’t you want to find a place to stay with me / don’t you want to find a way

 

 

 

CANEY FORK OVERLOOK

 

in the back of the van lies a gold hearted man / he is sleeping like a log / at the caney fork overlook on the later side of august / we are five thousand feet and six hundred more / and the range of light is an ocean / we are sitting on the shore / and I’m thinking about the quality of the metal in my chest / shining copper in its common / shining silver at its best / but I feel the alchemy / we are liquid at the core / here at five thousand feet / and six hundred more / and the range of light is an ocean / we are pushing off the shore / to the sound of summer ending / the sound of summer ending 

 

 

 

GATHER AND GROW 

 

harvest moon / I’m a fool / I’ve got so much growing to do / growing to do / I did not tend / my garden / now the winter’s coming in / it’s coming in / do you think I have time to pull up the weeds / to clean out the bed for the winter seeds / I’ll stay up all night in the silver light and / gather and grow and survive / harvest moon / in your view / I can see the shadow in me / the shadow in me / do you think I have time to pull up the weeds / to clean out the beds for the winter seeds / I’ll stay up all night in the silver light and / gather and grow and survive / and survive / harvest moon / I’m a fool 

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SURVIVORS 

 

someday the desert will return / to the bottom of the ocean / old survivors of rotation / old survivors of reunion / they don’t use straight lines / all our dust and our vibration / making up the constellation / old survivors of rotation / old survivors of reunion / I try to make straight lines / I try to map the time / I try / but the moon doesn’t use the door / the moon doesn’t know what that’s for / it just pours / someday everything returns / someday everything returns 

 

 

 

BOX 

 

thinking on this life you made / I’ve been looking through it lately / at pictures of me / red clay dirt and sticky hands / the day I fell to understand gravity is a real thing / and I know I scared you half to death / diving has its consequences / everything is learned it’s true / but not if no one teaches you / love is an action / love is a verb / and mama I’m just out here looking for a way / to give it back and also make it stay / cause mama there is a man out here / making gravity disappear and I can’t see the bottom but I’m diving in / just like the child that I was back then / thinking on this life you made

 

 

PACIFIC

 

pacific is bigger / than I ever knew / until I got in her / and the water it moved / yeah it moved me / and if I was frightened / out there on the shore / well I had good reasons / but I don’t anymore / yeah it moved me / there’s nowhere to go where the earth doesn’t quake / it moved me

 

 

 

THE STORMS ARE GETTING STRONGER

 

late the morning when I rise / I have never seen the water so high / how it’s coming up the wall / coming up the wall / and the splashing in my chest / is an ancient current / and I am trying to connect / trying to connect to it / and the bells of alarm can be a song / ringing out until the dawn / until all at once they’re gone / and how do they know / when to come back and when to go / and how a bird will be a bird / and how a bird will make a bird / how the bells of alarm / sound like a song / ringing out until the dawn / until all at once they’re gone / pendulum how do I trust / something swinging with such distance / and now the storms are getting strong / the storms are getting stronger 

RIDGELINE - 2013 

UNLOCKED 

​

I can hear the chains come rattling / in the back of the room I am listening / and the lights are getting dimmer / but I can feel it like I’m front row center / here we go - here we go down deep this is what I need / I don’t want these shoes on my feet / and I can’t stand the sleeves in this heat / now the bodies unlocked have started moving / just a turn from the hip we are shedding / here we go / here we go down deep this is what we need / it has been many years to this day / since I dropped down the mountain with your words all up in my face / and the lights in the city below were so bright and I was so inspired oh / here we go / here we go down deep this is what we need / there’s a river of my memories / and it is bloating and spilling with every song that he sings / and I could drown me if I try to fight it / but it could take me to the se if I just ride / here we go / here we go down deep with is what we need / oh shake your thing cause I am listening.

 

THIS CHANGE

 

I wanna be a good girl just like I’ve always been -keeping some things closed but I keep mostly open / I spend enough time in the back room in the red lights with my bad friends / I want to have a good time / I want to make it last / want to walk through the garden slowly / I want to get all the work done fast / and I want you to know / that I am afraid of this change / of this change / I want to have my freedom / I want to keep the trust / want to sleep sound in the comfort / I want to wake aloud with lust / and what about the moon? /  what about the tides? / what about a balance on this scale when I want all of the things on both of the sides / and I know that you are afraid / of this change / I fire in all directions / but I’m surprised / if I don’t hit the center / but I want to be a good girl just like I’ve always been / though my mind gets twisted but my heart is open

my heart is open - is open. 

 

FRONTIER MORNING

 

far away from my city / far away from my man oh / I got no connection to anything for miles / for miles / the snow falls down on this frontier morning / and I’m wide awake in my frontier dreams / but I am no pioneer / no I’m afraid of settling / but I found a secret / in these miles / and the mountains speak their truth in silence / and I’ve been talking to much / but I am no engineer / I just make these words they are not enough / but I found a secret / and I’m gonna keep it / with these miles / on the edge of this wilderness / there’s a lot I’m leaving behind / but my wagon is covered / and my face is leather and lined / with these miles / and the snow falls down on this frontier morning 

 

SAME SKY

 

this is not your fault / this is not your fault at all / there is no blame to place on a star before it falls / and the sky is the same / but I am not / no I have changed / so what do we do in this room / with the lights all shining through / and our bodies filtering different versions of our dreams? / there’s a place on the other side / will we make it there together?/ will we make it there alive? / will we become like perfect strangers / crumbling stones on a ride? / will we land where we want to in a world so big and wide? / and what do we do in this room with the lights all shining through / and our bodies filtering different versions of our dreams? / but this is not your fault - this is not your fault at all 

 

THE HUSTLE

 

this day has been a long one / the shadows stretching out way before the morning sun / this day has been a hard one / and it gets harder every time I sit down and let it / this day could be the same one every morning if I wake up with this wild uncertainty of my time / of my time / no you can’t make it no you can’t save it but you can waste it if you don’t place it and you sure got it / and Its all that you got / baby all that you got is your time / I got a little bit left and you can have it / cause I’m so tired of thinking about the ways I spend it is it worth it is it worth it how I spent it all today / spent it all in one place / don’t be mad you know you do it to yourself and don’t be sad you know think about everybody else its not so bad you’re just a shadow of yourself so get your shit together now cause its about time that you were leaving / you gotta get out there and make something of your / time I got a little bit left and you can have it / cause I’m so tired of thinking about the ways I spend it is it worth it is it worth it how I spent it all today / spent it all in one place / sometimes I still dream about the highway / and the night I laid myself out in the dark / and there was no one coming and no one going / no questions no answers just stars / I don’t know if I have anything to offer and I don’t know if I have anything to share and I don’t know if this is what I should be doing but I woke up with this feeling with this feeling with this feeling and this time / I got a little bit left and you can have it / Lets go miles from thinking about the ways we spend it lets just spend it lets just spend it lets just spend it all today / spend it all in this place  

 

QUIET DOWN

 

well I went for a walk / where the pines just sway and the chairs just rock / and soon I forgot / all the names that were dropping / got away from the noise and the talking / cause the world’s been so loud / yeah the world’s been so loud / I want to quiet it down / quiet down / let the song slip gentle in my veins / and the sun just sinks / and the chords just change / and it spreads savage / to the brightest part / of the darkness / and I know there is magic / but it needs to be practiced / but I let in the doubt / I let in the doubt / and it is so loud / and I just want to quiet it down / this is what I’m afraid of / living my life in the shade while the sun is just out in the street and I’m still inside just looking into your eyes while the whole world is passing us by and where there was two baby now there’s three / cause I let in the doubt / I let in the doubt / and it is so loud / and I just want to quiet it down / yeah I just want to quiet it down  

 

RIDGELINE

​

I know the weight of the bowls and the plates and the spoons / i know the covers on your books / i know the color of the clutter in your room / I know the shape that you make when you wake / I know how you give and how you take / but I don't know you anymore / I don't know you anymore / I know that my dragons have emerged / I know that my planet has returned / I know what I wore when it ended up on the floor / and I know how it feels when its real / but I don't know you anymore / I don't know you anymore / and as this continent divides I cannot seem to pick a side / I am just stuck on this ridge line / there is too much to leave behind / there is too much to carry on / there is nothing to push off from / and oh my god the damage is done / cause I don't know you anymore / I don't know you anymore / I know that hearts break in different ways / yours was a bone and mine is a wave

 

LOST BOY

​

Remember when I flew here / we were laughing in the dark / and I was just a lost boy / and I landed in the park / oh the trees / from a far off country / and they grow wild and they're growing so free / I lay down and gaze up from underneath / the edges of the city / are still settling their ways / quarters roll on our kitchen floor / and at any day we might break away / the seasons show no notice / for the passing of the time / they just wander up and down the beaches / of this adolescent coastline / and its easy to fall in love / in a place where nothing grows up / forget about solid ground / those are doors you shut / and how old am I this year / who have I become / I know that time is passing here / but where is it coming from? / where is it coming from / how long till it hits me / till the crest begins to break / cause a lost boy always finds herself / in the space between to go or stay / oh the trees / from a far off country / and they grow wild / and they're growing so free / and I lay down and gaze up from underneath 

 

DEEP SOUTH 

​

Tell me a story / to remember your face by / I'm not gonna see you for a long time / so make it a good one / cause you got a flavor / stuck on the roof of my mouth / got me thinking about the deep south / fresh water and rope swings / and our shiniest selves showed up to compel one another / oh caution be tossed you know I could get lost in the light of your summer / but I'm walking away I'm walking away to stay straight / I'm walking away I'm walking away it takes time to formulate / we all have our reasons / to be the places that we are / some fall in line some follow hearts some just fall in love with everything / this is the problem / I get out at every junction / always looking for the best one / but you know there are too many / and everyone that you meet is a different street you could have walked down / and there are places to go when you're living exposed and wide open / but I'm walking away I'm walking away to stay straight / I'm walking away I'm walking away I need time to formulate / so tell me a story to remember your face by / maybe I'll see you on the other side of my marinating 

 

CITY STREETS 

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you're gonna be here awhile / you're gonna be here way longer then you want to / you're gonna feel this awhile / you're gonna feel every breath you take is haunted / but before it was your story these were only city streets / and before it was this monster it was just a place for people to meet / for people to meet / you're gonna hear this awhile / there are no songs you can sing to stop this feeling / the pit of your stomach is loud / the ache is awake and the ground beneath is sinking / but before the bottom dropped out you were sure there was a chance / and before the songs were shotguns they were just a place for people to dance / for people to dance / and I know that someday you will walk down these streets and the names will change meaning again and your feet will stop pointing away from the places you loved / you did love them / you still love them / you still love them / but you're gonna be here awhile / you're gonna be here way longer then you want to.  

 

SIDEWAYS


kept our secrets in the south /told ourselves we'd work it out / and all I need are rolling scenes / that take me back to my place of birth / leave my hat get my worth / along the highways we move sideways / solid ground is hard to find / living is a state of mind / and Georgia dear I need you here / to ask the past into my home / future's heavy as a stone / it keeps on coming I keep running / spend the night on someones floor / mama's on guard at the door / choose to see what you believe

 

 

AGAIN

 

nights like this are beginning / the world rolling out at your feet / everything you lean into just meets you / a new color, a new thing / nights like this you remember the old glow holing up in your bones / and everything in your ribcage is moving / with new music from long ago / I’m gonna try again / gonna try again / the year is new as you make it / patterns don’t break on their own / everything you’ve done can stay with you / same cargo, different boat / take me down to the river / I am going for another run / there is no starting over / it goes on / this time will be different / just like all the ones before / gonna try again / gonna try again

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